Kaise kaise sawaal poochte ho ji

Last evening, a friend called me up after a long time. Now, when you meet or talk to a long-lost langotiya yaar types friend, you tend to become emotional. And that is what we became after the customery hello-hi-how are you lines. Our conversation went something like this…
Friend: Abey tu kahan tha ab tak yaar?
Me: Isi duniya mein yaar.

And the conversation continued for some 15 mins. till we had nothing to say or tell to each other. Now, in situations like these when both of you go silent (as if Mallika Sherawat just said I luv you to you), you tend to go blank as how to continue the conversation. Tabhi mera dost bol pada, “Kuch kaho?”.
Me: Kuch
Friend: Matlab?
Me: Abey tune hi to kaha ‘kuch kaho’.
And we burst out laughing.
Ab iss tarah ke aur bhi bahut saare incidents hain. Apni Dilli ki DTC bus ke conductors ko hi lelo. Bolte hain Ticket bolo..ticket bolo. Aur kuch yaatri maje lete hue kehte hain ‘Nahin bolunga…ja kya karega’. Conductor bolta hai ‘Abey gaadi tere baap ki hai. Ticket bol.’ Yaatri bolte hain, ‘Ticket. Ab kush? Aur kitni baar bolun ticket?’

In school days, we used to ask for lifts on our way back home. Ab jaise hi koi autowallah aake rukta tha..the conversation was like…
Me: Bhaiya Adarsh Nagar jaoge?
Autowallah: Haan
Me : To jao
:P

Doosra tareeka autowaale ko pareshaan karne ka…
Me: Bhaiya khaali ho?
Autowallah: Haanji Bolo.
Me: Hamare saath cricket kheloge. Wicket keeper ban jao.
Autowallah: grrr….

These days TOI ppl are giving a lot of stress on ‘I’. According to them, ‘I’ should not be written in capital, it should be in small caps as ‘i’. Reason: Other letters are also written in small case. So y allow I to be in upper case. Ye kaun sa editor hai jo Queen Victoria ke English ko challenge kar raha hai, bhai. So, in every article, the humble ‘I’ now appears as less than humble ‘i’. Kitna ganda lag raha hoga hamare ‘I’ bhai saab ko. Aisa feel kar raha hoga jaise John Abraham ganja ho gaya ho. But, I found the importance of ‘I’ only when a few days back saamne waale Chauhan uncle advertised for a vacant room by putting up a ‘To Let Available’ sign on his main gates. Now, gali ke ladke itne shaitaan hai ki beech mein ‘I’ daal diya. Ab batao, jo dekhe woh hanse. Kyon? Bhaiya mere, ab sign board per likha tha ‘ToILet Available’.
Last heard, some landlords have put the 'To Let' sign a bit above so that they remain out of the reach of shaitaan children. And some landlords of our colony are advertising for vacant rooms in local newspapers. After all, ‘To Let’ ka sawaal hai.
:)
You ppl have got any such things to share? Do tell me.

Isse kehte hain success...

At age 4, success is... not peeing in your pants.
At age 12, success is... having friends.
At age 16, success is... having a driver's license.
At age 20, success is... having sex.
At age 35, success is... having money.
.
.
.
.
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....At age 50, success is... having money.
At age 60, success is... having sex.
At age 70, success is... having a driver's license.
At age 75, success is... having friends.
At age 80, success is... not peeing in your pants.

Injection of Life

A day before my second semester French language exams, I was trying to gulp all that was taught in the class. The second semester had not gone well. My reputation of being a bright student had been dented. None other than Kavita Ma’m, my first semester professor, whom I had met a few days back in the corridors of AFD, told me that she was all praise for me while talking to Charu Ma’m. But Charu Ma’m told her otherwise. That I am not even 10% of what Kavita had told her. And I was all embarrassed facing Kavita. I could only muster “Don’t worry, Kavita, I’ll pass the exams.”
“Is passing exams your objective?,” replied Kavita, a little upset.
“Je suis desole. It’s not,” I said chokingly (God! Save me. She is gonna kill me now). “What not. Passing exams is not going to take you anywhere. You stupid,” Kavita scolded me.
Frankly, I was kinda shaken and stirred. I had taken the second sem lightly believing that I would anyway come out on tops in the exams. I wasn’t sure if I would be able to clear the sem. But I had promised Kavita of passing the exams. And at this moment, that was the best I could do to salvage my pride..and hers too. So, here I was slogging at the 11th hour. While I was going through my class notes, I just said to myself, “Uff…lagta hai first sem tukke mein clear ho gaya.” My brother, who was busy playing computer games, overheard my words and instantly replied, “Dost, tukke bhi achche khiladi ke hi lagte hain.”
As funny as it sounds, this is what I needed at that moment.
“Wow man! What a great thought,” I was impressed.
All my energy, which had gone on vacation, was back. Those words acted like magic and I must confess they reaffirmed my belief in myself. No wonder, I am now into my third sems (Why? I passed the exams with flying colours yaar.). And this time, I’m lovin’ it. J
At that moment, I realized how a few encouraging words said at the right time can rev up someone feeling low in life. Sometimes, when we are low on confidence, sometimes when we feel like giving up after all our hard work, a few words of encouragement from anyone can boost our morale and inject a new life into us. We need such injections to live life happily. Don’t you think so? Those few words act as elixir. Moreover, it’s not necessary that the words of encouragement come from your mentor. And, you don’t need to attend costly motivation seminars, listen to management gurus, or read motivational books to recharge your senses. It may come from anybody. Anyone surrounding you. May be an elderly person, a friend, your boss, your colleague, a stranger, or even a kid. For me, my brother was the mentor at that moment. And I am happy, I could extract something from his words. Some people have this habit of saying goods things at the most appropriate time, which has a magical effect on others. They are all around us. We just need to look for such people. We just need to separate the wheat from the chaff. So, whenever in doubt, just look around and find someone who can inject a new life into your beliefs.

Fourth Finger

Here's a post i read on Priya Iyer's blog. Liked it very much. Thought i wud share it with all my friends out here. Hope you too like it. :) Don't forget to try it and tell me wat happened. I, at least, found it true in my case. :)

"Why do we wear our wedding ring on the fourth finger?
As has been glorified a number of times by our very own Hindi films, the left fourth finger has a nerve that goes to the heart. It is for this very reason that the wedding ring is worn on this finger. Direct dil se connection, you see?
This mail, however, has something different to say. The thumb represents parents, second finger represents brothers and sisters, center finger represents our own self, fourth finger represents your partner and the last finger represents your children. (as per the Chinese people).
The mail goes on to say that God created this as a miracle. Put both your palms together and fold down both your third fingers.

Now, if you try to separate your thumbs, you will be able to do so. This indicates that our parents will leave us one day.
Now close the thumb and try to separate the first fingers. Again, you will be able to do this. This indicates that our brothers and sisters will leave us, as they will have their own families.
The center finger signifies our own self, so it is not considered in this game.
Now, join your first fingers together and try to separate your last finger, i.e. the little finger, which signifies our children. This indicates that our children will move away from us sooner or later, when they have families of their own.
Now for the best part. Join your little fingers together and try to separate the fourth fingers. You will not be able to separate them. At least, me and my friends were not able to. As per the legend, these fingers represent the husband and wife and the lack of separation indicates that they are meant to stay together throughout life, through thick and thin.
The mail ended with the line “Real love will stick together forever and ever.”
I tried it out without folding down the third fingers, and it still worked.
I don’t know how far this is true and what is the ‘logical explanation’ for the ‘miracle’ that happens, but I found it rather sweet. It appealed to the illogical, mushy part of me. :) Do try it out and let me know your views in the comments section.

I am very much tempted to add a joke that I read somewhere:
Mrs. X: Mrs. Y, why are you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?
Mrs. Y: Because I married the wrong man!!"

Anything for u ma'm

Hi! It's been a long time since i did anything worthwhile...i mean, with my blog. So here i am...back without a bang. Actually, after a long time i read a gud novel, which again forced my to write something abt it. A book recommended by a wonderful reviewer..only she doesn't realise. The book i m referring to is...Anything for u ma'm by Tushar Raheja. Cool, lovely, emotional, and most of all, a hilarious, funny account of a guy's luv for his gal. This one's a must read for all those who have fallen in luv. I m not going to talk much abt this book 'coz it ll spoil the charm..read it n ya ll know y i liked it so much.
Another book that i just finished reading was Joker in the Pack. I picked up thinking it wud be smthing similar to Anything for u ma'm. but it turned out to be a very boring account of an IIM guy's life at IIMs. Nothing worth mentioning, except it cost me double the amt that i paid for Anything for you ma'm. :(
And in turn gave me less than half the entertainment that i got from reading Anything.... :(